New Year Resolutions – the lighter hidden side of the serious intentions

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Who does not make resolutions for the coming year? Be it in the mind or a ritual of To Dos jotted down as a numbered list it has become fashionable and faddist. When others all round are making their lengthy notes on what they hope to achieve by the end of the new year, one feels awkward and embarrassed if asked what were one’s New Year Resolutions and nothing to recite.

New Year Resolutions could range from the extremely profound to the absolutely absurd or eccentric types, depending on the age group and the living styles.

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Picture the serious and meaningful ones that adults make, like:

1. I shall be punctual and never late for work henceforth.  (hopefully starting Jan.1^st)
2. I shall avoid posing questions to my boss and carry out instructions to a T, however ridiculous they may seem. ( It will put me in his good books and give chance for a raise)
3. I shall always smile when I see my next-door neighbors here onwards. (Never mind the loud blare of their stereo system at odd hours, their nasty tiffs starting close to midnight)
4. Now onwards I shall always be truthful ( except when something could go against me)
5. I shall remain calm at all times (never mind even if for no reason attempts are made to provoke me)
6. I shall help my wife in the household chores ( only if I am free and in a mood to help)
7. and a whole lot of other such which are seemingly achievable but only time will tell.

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And take the absurd or meaningless ones like:

1. I shall be good to my neighbours’ German Sheperd (by always maintaining a safe distance from it),
2.  I shall stop eating sweets and stay that way for the year (except during festivals, at birthday parties I attend, when visitors give without being told to bring home)
3.  I shall not quarrel with my wife henceforth (when did I ever get to open my mouth in an argument?)
4. I shall be in bed by 10 P.M. daily. (what! and miss my favourite TV shows from 10 P.M. to 11.30 P.M.?)
5. Save at least 10 % of my salary every month (with a meager one and with loan EMIs, insurance, groceries and other household needs to take care of every month?)and a whole lot of  inane unachievable promises to oneself.

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The college going crowd has a more down-to-earth and flexible approach with no tags for the not achieved tasks.

You have things like:

• I shall talk to Chunnu, Munnu, Selvi, Maithili, Gungun and friends henceforth, but shall avoid the stuck-up twins Gayatri and Gangotri, Mustafa, Marilyn, and the Chemistry batch II gang, even more. (Will it make a difference to the other party? or start a mini war?)
• I shall be regular in Prof. Sharma’s Physics lectures henceforth (can’t promise that I will stay awake)
• We shall visit the canteen less and have only two samosas at a time. ( But we could have longer spells of sitting there and  easily substitute more bread pakodas, gulab jamun, and others for samosas)
• I shall not flunk in any subject this time ( even if I study only just before the exams begin)
•  I shall not browse the internet daily at home (who cares when I carry my laptop to college?)

And with the changing times could the school- going kids more informed and more experimental than earlier, be left behind?

You could have:

•  I shall complete my home work promptly and regularly (provided Mom sits with me and helps with half of it)
• I shall henceforth not do mischief in class like putting earthworms in the girls’ tiffin boxes (it is too slow and not very scary. small frogs would be better.)
• I will be obedient towards all teachers ( except meek Miss Minnie who never scolds and would be a good one to scare with the Diwali rocket this time)
• I shall keep my room at home, neat and tidy. (Only when Mom refuses to oblige and refuses me second helpings of dessert.)

These are but samples of what people expect to get themselves to do with resolutions at the beginning of the year. By the time the year ends, half would be carried forward to the next year, some could seem worthless to pursue and from the remaining, it could be done or partially done.

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A long list of firm resolutions taken at the beginning, that is converted into a miserable small list of ticked items with a large number of crossed or unmarked ones at the end.

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