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Article: New Year resolutions 2016

New Year resolutions 2016

New Year resolutions 2016

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It is always interesting to know what people intend to do in the coming year. A new to-do list, a fresh resolve to see that all resolutions are seen through by the end of the year, making others fulfill their resolutions despite failing oneself etc.etc. (backlogs get added on or modified to be part of the new list). Some make it like a calendar (month-wise), some others have a miniature list snugly fitted in the purse, while the vast majority prefers to stick it someplace where their eyes fall upon it every time they pass it, like a fridge door, cupboard door, study table front or side (if used regularly), kitchen shelf. Very few trust the list to memory.


Plenty of serious faces, tons of paper and inking of what promises to be a popular document read the most number of times during the year.


Let us see some interesting or brilliant specimens that have come from all over India, courtesy - a special survey conducted by the expert study group of Swadesh, travelling the four corners of the country.


The harassed people
  • Ramesh Muthupillai has sworn and made it a New Year resolution never to have anything to do with Chennai’s suburbs and always be in the vicinity of Poes Garden, where the water cannot get to him. After the recent floods he experienced at his current home, which saw him afloat with a life saver jacket tied 24 hours by three days, he has made this resolution. He had to sleep horizontally holding onto window grills or hang from some ceiling hook for comfort. He has also resolved to write a book titled ‘staying afloat despite troubles around you’ as a DIY for beginners.
  • Cheryl Chugh has decided that she shall follow the odd-even formula of being in and out of Delhi throughout the year, toNew-Years-Resolutions_headline-imagecontribute her mite towards reducing the pollution levels and also save herself partially in avoiding the pollutants contributed by others’ mite, especially of those following the even-odd formula.
  • Never at a loss but confused this time, a resolution by Meenakshi Menthapalya regarding learning swimming in 2016 has given her two sleepless nights. She wanted to experiment with holding her breath, but failed beyond 13 seconds. Learning swimming through coaching could be fun, especially with friends of her group accompanying her. A sudden desire that surged through her especially when she read about the weather bureau predicting the time correctly about the flood in Chennai but having got the day wrong. What if she was fast asleep and the Musi river decided to enter her home in the dead of the night in Banjara Hills, Hyderabad?
The political class
  • There could be more Chai Pe Charcha sessions the coming year if Prime Minister Modi has his way. Resolving to be more accommodating to the Opposition’s demand for the government to do better floor management, it was felt that this could be maxresdefaulta surefire method of getting attendance in the two houses and maybe one or two bills passed. There could be a white paper on this if the plan works and attendees fall over themselves to have the hot cuppa in hand and decide issues of consequence. Last heard from a doubter, what if the quality of tea was not up to the mark?
  • The Congress has renewed its commitment with a resolve to have better organized, slickly arranged walk-outs for the next round of sessions in Parliament for 2016. An agenda drawn up by the Vice-President, signed by the Congress President could have additional thrills in a bid to keep up with the tempo of 2015 to generate interest and innovative skills to disrupt sessions, not witnessed earlier. It’s going to be different seems to be resolutely guaranteed.
  • The PM has resolved to draw up a list of countries that he has not been able to visit since he came to power in 2014. Based on the list the remainder of the term of five years would be utilized in making the necessary trips before the next elections. Since there was no guarantee that the next five years would be his.
The seasoned generation
  • Mungeri Master believes he is still fit enough to learn kung-fu despite being a ripe 70. Not at all his fault when Idea (mobile6800119-kung-fu-panda company) gives ideas, of being able to do anything before ‘you step into the grave’ or add ‘your fuel to the fire’. He was particularly impressed with this martial art when he saw Kung Fu Hustle and Enter the Dragon, back-to-back.
  • Noni Nagpuria saw herself walking the aisle with the cigar tycoon Fernandez in her dreams seven times in a row but in new colorful outfits each time and believed it to be a message from the Almighty. She has decided that she would contact him, invite him over, pop the question on New Year’s eve on the sands of Chowpatty. Never mind that she lived in Byculla, sold fish and dreamt of owning a 1-BHK soon, while he swanked about in Juhu, had a palatial bungalow, smoked, drank and idled away his time doing everything that his huge wealth afforded him. Neither know each other. It is naturally not her fault that she just chanced to see him smiling down at her from the billboard with the caption ‘’ Hum Hain Tho Kya Ghum Hai” and took the words seriously.
  • Miss Madan of Ghatkopar would like to be Mrs. Bhatporia and her childhood friend Hemant Bhatporia would like to have somebody matching him shoulder to shoulder. Unless the Gods wish it not, 2016 shall indeed see their resolution happen and soon. Miss Madan at 65 years and Hemant at 80, could be having their first honeymoon stopover at the Elephanta caves. Details of their other plans are awaited. As it is said - Love just cannot die.
The college crowd (the most innovative in resolutions)
  • Melinda, Preeti, Ashutosh, Bella and the entire crowd of B.com III at St.Francis College have decided resolutely that they will not be making any resolutions for themselves for the year 2016. Instead they shall be first clearing the backlog of 2015 (like their exams), since it is pressing on their conscience.
  • A resolution has been passed by the Great Rayman College Board for 2016. There have been many gadgets allowed for the odd-even-2exams by many institutions across the world. This time with 4G available internet mobiles could also be used (and with no restrictions). What the students did not reckon was that internet signals would be barred during the exam timings.
  • Students of a certain college that does not wish to be named have made resolutions about doing their best in the curricular year, attending every class that is held, completing their assignments on time, being on their best behavior on the campus and elsewhere, and be an asset to their institution. Of course with the pre-condition that they would be guaranteed a safe passage to the next class without fail.

There are very many groups besides these, who have their own ways to kick start the New Year. The school kids, the kitty party types, the fashion fiends, the happy-go-lucky types, the studious lot, the canteen types, the Facebook gangs, the Twitter die-hards and on and on; a list that is never-ending.


New Year resolutions are a fad, a way to stem a routine and begin anew, a way to impress oneself, a tradition that continues year after year. Nothing changes noticeably but things soon become noticeable when resolutions are made, acted upon and followed up with resolve every year.


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The common man or the Aam Aadmi


The most resilient of the lot and always full of resolutions at the start of the year, the one buffeted between government policy and the implementing arm of the policies, always at the mercy of the Karta Dharta, the one without face yet the force behind all, his is the biggest and most reliable of all resolutions – do your bit every day, support a cause come what may, empower the chosen in every way, obey the law whatever they say, express little by little but make them pay.


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